Christianity ? ...

In the last year I have witnessed another side of christianity. It is not pleasant. If I had to compare it with something know to many ... I would have to compare it to the crusades. Filled with lies, bigotry, hatred and double-standards. I sometimes wonder what I am supposed to be learning here ... or if I am missing the boat altogether. I found out today that I will get no raise, no bonus and have been taken out of the loop at the workplace. I can sign nothing. I still have a job ... or I could be considered to be a babysitter. I have no authority but, all the responsibility lies on my shoulders. I believe I did the right thing by coming back here to care for my Ma. I also believe that I made a huge mistake by taking a position with the company that I now work.
There are so many questions that I ask Him on a daily basis but, seem to get no answer.
I am at the end of my rope ... so I will tie a knot and try to hang on.
for it is by grace that you have been saved and this not from yourself ... it is the gift of God ... so that no-one can boast