Hmmmm? .....

I've been up, down and all around the board with my emotions lately. I wanna run but yet I wanna stay. I wonder too if I am trying to earn something. Am I supposed to be here or am I here because of some sense of obligation. Why do I feel I have to be in vocational ministry ? The Word tells me "Whatever my hand finds to do ... do it with all my heart." I will continue to seek His guidance and the counsel of other godly people.
I must consider prayerfully the opportunities that lie before me. I also want to do the right thing. I think that He may be giving me another chance at "real work." Not that ministry isn't real work ... because it is. I have been used to working with my hands on a daily basis. I think Judy sees that in me. She has little projects for me all the time. I am thankful for her. She makes working here bearable.
I think Alvin is getting close to getting the retail sales license. How do I tell him and the the rest of the ministry that I want NO part in retail sales. I have my reasons. Could we bring in more money ? Yes, but at what cost ? How long will we sit on vehicles. I already think Alvin lives in a dreamworld when it comes to pricing. Even without the retail license I've seen things stay way too long. The RV should've been gone a long time ago.